Letting Go of Perfectionism: Finding Freedom Inside and Outside of Work

Perfectionism—it's the invisible weight many of us carry, often without realizing it. We strive for flawlessness in everything we do, whether at work or in our personal lives. But here’s the truth: perfectionism doesn’t exist. It’s an illusion that keeps us stuck in an endless cycle of striving, without ever reaching the satisfaction or peace we hope for.

As someone who has struggled with perfectionism myself, I want to share how I’ve learned to break free from its grip. Let’s dive into why perfectionism is a myth, how it negatively affects our lives, and, most importantly, how to let it go.

The Myth of Perfectionism

Perfectionism often starts innocently. We want to do our best, push ourselves to be the best version of who we can be. But over time, that desire for excellence can morph into an unhealthy pursuit of flawlessness. The truth is, perfection doesn’t exist. No matter how hard we try, we will never be able to meet a standard that only exists in our minds.

Perfectionism tricks us into believing that if we can just get everything "right," we’ll be happy, successful, and accepted. The reality, though, is that this mindset often leads to burnout, procrastination, and self-criticism. Instead of boosting our performance, perfectionism stifles creativity and growth.

How Perfectionism Shows Up at Work

At work, perfectionism might look like:

• Overthinking every detail of a project, even the smallest ones that have little impact on the overall outcome.

• Procrastinating because the idea of starting something and not doing it perfectly feels overwhelming.

• Fear of delegation, believing that no one else can do the job as well as you.

• Avoiding feedback, because deep down, any critique feels like a personal failure.

Example: You’re working on a presentation and spend hours fine-tuning every slide, double-checking each word, and tweaking colors endlessly. You’re so focused on making it perfect that you miss the bigger picture—your message. In the end, you’re left with something that’s flawless in design but lacks the impact and creativity it could have had if you weren’t so hung up on the details.

The Effects of Perfectionism in Your Personal Life

Outside of work, perfectionism can take over everything from parenting to self-care. It might show up as:

• Constantly comparing yourself to others, feeling inadequate no matter what you achieve.

• Setting impossibly high standards for how your home should look or how you should parent your children.

• Neglecting your needs because you’re too busy trying to meet an unrealistic ideal of what a "perfect" life looks like.

Example: You want to host a family dinner but spend so much time planning the perfect menu, cleaning the house to perfection, and worrying about every detail, that by the time your guests arrive, you’re too exhausted to enjoy the event. Perfectionism has stolen the joy from something that could have been a simple, memorable gathering.

The Freedom of Letting Go

Letting go of perfectionism is liberating. It allows us to embrace our imperfections, to learn from our mistakes, and to grow in ways we couldn’t if we were stuck in a constant cycle of striving for the unattainable. Here are some practical tips to help you break free:

1. Reframe Your Thinking - Instead of focusing on perfection, aim for progress. Ask yourself: "What’s the best I can do with the time and resources I have?" This mindset shift helps you focus on growth rather than flawlessness.

2. Set Realistic Expectations - Recognize that it’s okay for some things to be "good enough." Whether it’s a report at work or your daily workout routine, accept that perfection isn’t the goal—completion is. Celebrate progress over perfection.

3. Allow Yourself to Make Mistakes - Mistakes are opportunities for learning, not indicators of failure. Start embracing imperfection as part of the process. When you make a mistake, ask yourself, “What can I learn from this?”

4. Practice Self-Compassion - Be kind to yourself. Perfectionism often stems from a harsh inner critic. Start practicing self-compassion by treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you’d offer a close friend. Remind yourself that nobody gets it right 100% of the time.

5. Set Boundaries - Perfectionism can make us say "yes" to everything, believing that we should be able to handle it all. Learn to set healthy boundaries and say no when necessary. This will free up your energy for the things that truly matter.

6. Embrace "Done" - One of the biggest traps of perfectionism is never feeling like a task is finished. Try embracing "done" over "perfect." It’s better to complete a task at 80% than to never complete it because you’re chasing 100%.

Final Thoughts

Letting go of perfectionism both at work and in life is a process. It’s not something that happens overnight, but the more you practice embracing imperfection, the more freedom you’ll find. Life becomes lighter, more joyful, and more fulfilling when you stop striving for perfection and start living with acceptance. Remember, there’s beauty in imperfection—and that’s what makes us human.